Skip to content

Marks Out Of Ten : FILM

Here are some films that got a lot of buzz and I saw them and reviewed them.

CALL ME BY YOUR NAME : 7.4/10

cbm1.jpg

A film about two loaded, good looking, white males (Elio and Oliver) who start fucking whilst on holiday. Starring TIMOTHEE CHALAMET + ARMIE HAMMER. 

PROS

  • Beautiful cinematography, beautiful location. Thnx Luca! 
  • Good acting from Timmy T
  • Steamy sex scenes 😉
  • The Dad’s speech at the end was very poignant!! 

 

CONS

  •  Like most films, I didn’t actually believe the two main characters were IN LOVE. All Oliver and Elio seemed to do was have sex or have monosyllabic conversations, delivered in Armie Hammer’s (Oliver) militant voice. Let’s face it, he’s basically playing the Winklevoss twin again. Lol. 
  • The incessant play of “Love My Way” (great song), is the only real clue that the film is set in the 1980s. I thought it a bit unrealistic how given the period, there was no REAL feeling of struggle of sexuality, or discussion of it. I guess AIDS in Northern Italy wasn’t heard of. Maybe this was the point of the film, to be rid of all those very real elements of the time. To me it’s insulting to those who, especially given that point in time, got a lot of stick for being gay/bisexual. YES, this could be the story of those few who didn’t. But it made me think of rich boarding school boys who fuck each other under wraps in their dorm rooms and never discuss again.
  • Went on too long.

*SIDE NOTE: Armie Hammer revealed that his Mother didn’t want to see the film because she’s Catholic. “Everyone is entitled to their own opinion”………. Right..

 

I, TONYA : 8.8/10

itonya2
Could b me and Sebastian xx lol

A story of an underdog, who defies classist judges by doing the first axel jump ever. Starring Allison Janney, Sebastian Stan and Margot Robbie.

PROS

  • Brilliantly filmed, switching from digital and film camera
  • Gr8 soundtrack. ZZ Top, Fleetwood Mac, etc.
  • It’s the perfect dark comedy. Several moments in the film are incredibly violent, but counteracted by dumb comments made by white trash characters!
  • Sebastian Stan AKA Gossip Girl’s Carter Baizen looks FUEGO. S/O to the brown contacts he wore. 😉 
carter
A tense moment between Serena and Carter. xoxo  u know u love me

CONS

  • Margot Robbie is good, but her Australian accent comes through so many times it really beggared believe.  I respected her mostly for not sticking with playing the “blonde bombshell” who dissects plot lines from a bathtub. She also broke the fourth wall like ten times which reminded me of a year 8 play. Like there’d be a scene where she was violent and then she’d turn to the camera and say “I soo didn’t do that!”and then did it !!!! LIAR liar PANTS ON FIRE!! I respected her mostly for not sticking with playing the “blonde bombshell” who dissects plot lines from a bathtub.
  • The film went on a lickkkkkkle bit too long. You know those moments where you’re sure the film is about to end and it doesn’t? Where your ass feels increasingly numb and u wish u had more popcorn??  Yeah. There were several times I thought “what a good ending” and it just kept rolling on.

The SHAPE OF WATER: 6.4/10

 

shapey
Cheeky bit of egg action !

A film about a mute who falls 4 a swamp monster. (SPOILER ALERT) Starring  Sally Hawkins, Richard Jenkins and Michael Shannon.

PROS

  • Richard Jenkins is the saving grace here. His character is in an existential crisis, and faces a lot of rejection. His misfortunate is both heartwarming and at times, funny.
  • The cinematography is #sublime. One of dem ones that really sucks you out of reality and into a new world.
shapey3
Live Laugh Love

CONS

  • Just as I was starting to warm to the friendship between the mute and the creature, things get real creepy, real quick. One minute she goes from innocently feeding the thing eggs, next minute she’s taking off her nightdress for him and touching what we can only assume is his dick. Luckily we don’t see the full thing, but they definitely went the WHOLE WAY !! Eek.
  •  -It was a schlocky attempt at making a film that in parenthesis is saying “DIVERSITY IS GREAT, FALL IN LOVE WITH WHOMEVER YOU WANT”.  It felt more like Guillermo was exploring some sick fantasy he had, but to make it more ‘appealing’ to the masses threw in the irrelevant Russian spy characters, who just made the film seem even more dumb.

 

ANNA SAMPSON

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: